only me hope

people live for purposes. we've been created not for doing nothing. we have reason to live. have reason to breath. until He takes it back. this is my first post of new year. its not too late for me to say happy new year though. what i'm going to jot today is nothing for you to be bother with. i'm going to turn to 24 less than a month. seriously speaking, i'm afraid of this number. i'm going to be older, will be having more responsibilities and things will be more complicated for me. not so complicated if i can handle everything well. well, what i wish to achieve for this year i like to keep them within myself. i'll try harder and pray harder to achieve them. but the most important thing, i wanna be mature. more mature in thinking, saying and everything that i'll do. 24 is not a small number of age. it does give me a reason to be aware and wary. friends, people, others might not understand but this is what i feel the most. i'm starting to be afraid of what my life will lead me to. will i get a good job and everything? all are keep 'twirling' inside my head. does anyone will be my life partner and will i get a good life ahead? but the most thing i hope and wish for all my thoughts, i have someone to lean on. i have someone to go to when i'm down and in a peril situation. this thought seems like simple but still, it will give you the most strength ever when you have it. now, i'm wonder do i have someone to lean on right now? and the person should be understand me more than other people regardless my family.

to someone who lives in Kuching, i do apologize of what i did yesterday. thats me when i was not in a good mood. everything seems wrong. everything seems hopeless. sometimes you do give back my 'mood' but to be honest i hope you could do the same yesterday. especially yesterday. may be i put too much hope on you. i'm sorry.

2 papers remain and one practical exam. i hope i'll do best in all of them. i do hope and really hope i won't have to repeat any paper or delay in finishing my study. Allah, please give me barakah.

this is serious entry of me. and i'm waiting for that day to come.